First Time: Receiving an Overwhelming Amount of Advice

Have your baby naturally.

Get an epidural.

Don't get induced. The doctors aren't God.

Don't get a C-Section.

You should really breastfeed.

Don't worry about breastfeeding.

Put a blanket on the baby while he sleeps.

Blankets are dangerous in the crib.

You use a sleep suit? He looks ridiculous.

Let your baby nap on you all the time.

Wear your baby.

Make sure to breastfeed at least until 8 months.

Breastfeed for at least a year.

You need a wipe warmer.

You don't need warm wipes.

Don't bathe your baby every day.

Bathe your baby every day to create a routine.

Sleep train.

Sleep training is cruel.

Use only glass baby bottles.

Babies don't have schedules.

Your baby should sleep on his back.

Your baby should sleep on his stomach. What do doctors know?

Don't feed your baby solids at 4 months.

Feed your baby solids at four months.

Why would your pediatrician tell you that?

Do a lot of tummy time.

Only feed him puree food right now.

Feed him real food now, he'll be fine.

Your baby is probably hungry.

Make all of your babies food.

Use cloth diapers.

You should be wearing flats.

Just use regular diapers.

Speak to him in Spanish only.

Speak to him in both English & Spanish.

You stay home with your baby? Your baby needs to socialize with other babies.

The list never ends. Those are just a couple of the things I've heard even before my baby was born. Mind you, he's 6 months so the list goes on and on and on. While I appreciate advice from other mothers, not all advice applies. Not all advice is even based on anything thats been proven to be effective. What works for one child, may not work for another child. What works for one mom, may not work for another mom. What worked for YOUR family may not work for mine.

I definitely understand there are moms who have way more experience and knowledge than I do. Let's be real, millions of moms know more than I do. I also understand that there are moms out there who have tried outdated practices and their babies are fine and safe. There are also a lot of parents who have experienced losing their babies because of outdated advice and lack of knowledge.

Everything I do with my child, I research it thoroughly. I also ask my mom and my son's pediatrician if I have any concerns. If I need advice, I ask for it. There is so much information out there about every single thing related to babies. Why not use new technology and new practices? It's 2019 after all.

Let's remember to be kind to other mom's (especially new moms) and acknowledge that they are probably doing their best to care for their babies. When advice is offered, make sure it is based on research. Some advice is just rude and unwanted. Sometimes, it's not what you say, it's how you say it.

Let moms (and dads) come to you for advice when they need it. Every parenting style is different. Every mom is different. Every child is different. Listen to parents. Instead of offering excessive advice, offer help.

There have been times that I have cried from unwanted advice. There are other times I have fumed with anger because of advice. There are other times I have laughed from others advice. There have been times I have taken advice. If I feel the information is relevant, I'll ask the pediatrician or research it myself. Overall, I'm learning to just let people talk.

Have you experienced an overwhelming amount of "advice"? How did you handle it?


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